Some girls go for a flim-flam man. Some want a right-hand man. Sweet, she likes herself a song-and-dance man. A well-dressed, snap-heeled happy hoofer who can carry a tune and turn on a dime.
Were he here today, Fred Astaire could waltz away with Honey-pie’s heart. Those suits, that wit. Oh, the way he could twirl and tap. The one-handed back dip! Sweet could go on and on and on. Many an evening has she surrendered to the charms of Top Hat and The Gay Divorcee. And don’t even get her started on Funny Face. The combination of Fred and the Audrey “Goddess” Hepburn is like the movie equal to Milanos and milk.
 He’s bringing dancing back. And that’s all Sweet needs to know. |
But desserts come in many shapes and forms and so do dapper entertainers. Which gets La Cake to Le Timberlake, a.k.a. JT, also known by his given name, Justin Randall Timberlake (www.justintimberlake.com). If you ask Sweet (and she has to suppose that if you’re reading this column, then in some sense you did just that), Justin is Fred’s apparent heir.
Sweet knows, she knows: Some cannot imagine that a former ’N Syncer could be worthy of such acclaim. Lightweight, they cry. They apparently are not among the 2.5 million people who have purchased Futuresex/Lovesounds in the past five months. Those people, who of course count Sugaree among the flock, endorse JT as a well-rounded performer with an Astaire-like sense of humor about his job and they’re not embarrassed to say so. To which Sweet wants to add, just emerging unscathed from a boy band, not to mention a relationship with that other shaved Mousketeer, launches JT into the extraordinary, as far as she is concerned.
But back to the singing and dancing. As everyone but those living in an unlighted, soundproofed closet knows by now, Justin will bring his show to the John Paul Jones Arena on March 18. How rare is it to know the exact date when the man of your daydreams will be coming through town? Usually, these things catch a girl by complete surprise. Mr. Perfect strolls by at the very moment when you’re scraping gum off the bottom of your weekend Danskos, crouched in the most, um, unflattering position between parking spots.
Anyway, back to Candy Girl’s point—and she does have one. With more than two weeks to go, there’s plenty of time to prepare for JT. And what’s the most important thing to do to prepare for a song-and-dance man’s visit? A full-leg wax? Highlights? Fresh mascara and new makeup brushes? No, no, no and no.
The answer is Practice Your Dance Moves, silly! Several parties in town make that easier. For the next couple of Thursdays, R2 is hosting JT-inspired dance nights. And on Thursday, March 15, there will be a big blowout at Satellite Ballroom. Plenty of Justin remixes, show dancers—the whole shebang! And both R2 and Satellite will be doing ticket giveaways, too.
Not to worry. Sweet won’t be competing with any of you for seats. She bought her tickets months ago, leaving nothing to chance. JT is her kind of guy, and if anybody out there thinks that’s silly, well they can just cry Sweet a river. To paraphrase Timberlove himself, ain’t another man gonna take his spot, my Love.