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Arts

The many definitions of “camp”

“Flipping Out”
Tuesday 10pm, Bravo

This show follows the fortunes of Jeff Lewis, an L.A. house flipper who buys undervalued properties, renovates them and then quickly sells them for millions of dollars. He’s also a major drama queen. Although his business ventures generate their fair share of sturm und drang, people really tune in to watch Lewis’ many tantrums. Will he demote his assistant to trash duty for checking e-mail on his computer? Will he force an underling to take his miserable cat to the acupuncturist? Will he put Joan Crawford to shame with a hissy fit about finding onions in his salad? With tonight’s premiere of the second season, the shoe is on the other foot, as Lewis himself is now working for a demanding boss. This, of course, only prompts him to launch into even more spaz attacks.

“MVP”
Thursday 11pm, SOAPnet

This new soap is subtitled “The Secret Lives of Hockey Wives,” which is a little twee for my tastes. However, the show is worth noting because a) it’s an honest-to-god, unapologetic nighttime soap, which is rare in this post-Spelling era, and b) it’s billed as a SOAPnet original, when in fact it was originally a Canadian production for CBC, but was cancelled after low ratings couldn’t justify the extreme production costs. We’ll see if the cabler has better success with it. The setup is unique, following the behind-the-locker-room-door drama of a fictional hockey team and the “puck bunnies” who love them. The characters are pretty much soap stock: the bad boy looking for redemption, the princess on the prowl, the unspoiled innocent in way over her head. In case you miss the premiere, ABC will run it after the Daytime Emmy Awards ceremony on Friday.

“Camp Rock”
Friday 8pm, Disney

Since the “High School Musical” teat has just about been milked dry, and the mothers of America have collectively decided that Miley Cyrus is a wanton hussy for exposing her bare back, who will entertain our nation’s drooling ’tween horde? That’d be the Jonas Brothers. These blandly adorable, musically inclined, poofy-haired young men were biologically designed to make 12-year-old girls swoon. And they star in this new musical about a budding young musician who gets to hone her craft over the summer at Camp Rock, where she learns to…rock. And make googly eyes at cute boys, I’m sure. Expect this to be a smash, and for this to be the Summer of Jonas. At least until videos of whatever twisted shit they might be into—crack-fueled fisting orgies?—hit the Internet. Because, you know, it just may happen.

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