Q: Ace: When I go to Wal-Mart I try to park as close as possible, as would any good American. But I am kept from doing so due to the number of reserved spaces. For the handicapped and pregnant women, I understand. Wal-Mart, however, also reserves parking spaces for the police. Oh, Ace of all Aces, tell me: When did the cops become a demographic in need of special privileges?—Lay Z. Boyd
A: Poor Boyd, Ace understands how frustrating it can be to carry that new wide screen TV or oversized box of Froot Loops an extra 20 feet to the car. The wilds of our national parking lots have become the Outback of America and you don’t want to get caught out there on your own for too long without some soda and chips for sustenance.
But sarcasm aside, our local Wal-Mart and the police that protect it do have a special relationship mapped out. It doesn’t identify with any popular varieties such as “You Scratch My Back and I’ll Scratch Yours,” “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” or “A Family Affair.” In fact, according to the Albemarle County Police (under whose jurisdiction Wal-Mart falls), this case of cahoots is so special that the County cops did not even know it existed. A befuddled County officer, Corporal Jim Larkin, explained the relationship this way: “We don’t have any mandate [over] what people do with their parking spots.”
However, when pressed on the subject, Larkin exercised his powers of logic saying, “If I remember history, we’ve had a number of officers park in the fire lane when addressing shoplifting calls,” extrapolating that the reserved spaces are so designated for those times when criminals get caught after deciding that everyday low prices aren’t low enough.
To confirm Larkin’s logic, Ace phoned Wal-Mart and spoke with manager Shannon Moon. His first response to the question of the reserved parking spaces was similar to Larkin’s: “Yeah…um…there’s probably not anybody in the store who could tell you. I don’t know how long it’s been like that.”
Ever persistent, Ace called back the following day to find that Moon had done some investigation on his own and had spoken to a former manager. Both men agreed that, as Moon said, “It’s because of convenience for [the police] when they come—so they don’t have to block any fire lanes. [It] gets them as close to the front [of the store] as possible. I don’t think there’s a reason other than courtesy.”
So Boyd, as you can see, the reason for your long trek to the fourth parking space in from the storefront is simple. It may not be a case of “special privileges” so much as a simple case of courtesy. With smiley faces bouncing across their advertisements, and greeting committees on hand for every arrival and departure through store doors, “courtesy” is something Wal-Mart likes to think it knows a little something about.