You know how whenever people are asked what they are looking for in a mate, more often than not at the top of that list is something along the lines of "has to make me laugh"? I certainly fall into that segment of the population, and this has forced me to pointlessly ponder the following stupid question for about a week now: How come boys play guitars to get girls instead of become comedians to get girls? Because I for one (and I have a feeling I am fairly typical) have recently found that I am ridiculously susceptible to the sexiness of a bevy of hideously ugly comedians.
Eugene Mirman is something of a king among the ugly comedian set. In fact, as his website reads, "Thanks to television, touring and the Internet, he has become mildly famous. If you Google ‘Eugene,’ he is ranked 4th—behind the city in Oregon, their arts weekly and some other newspaper there. However, he is the number one ranked human ‘Eugene’ on Google. Nice!" The point is that Eugene is both a top-notch comedian and, by all superficial calculations, pretty ugly. This might be a mean thing to say if he weren’t so sexy. To experience firsthand what I am trying to explain, all you need to do is take a trip to Eugene’s website. There you can read his writing which is freaking hysterical, view his low-budget videos which are freaking hysterical (check out the pot smoking one and Special Agent Eugene), listen to his stand-up routines which are freaking hysterical and, yes, fall in love with the man himself, because he is freaking hysterical.
Thinking about the question I asked in my first paragraph, I’ve begun to conclude that the reason that boys typically use guitars rather than jokes to get girls is that guitars are easier to master. Jokes are for a rarer breed.