“What Not to Wear”
Friday 9pm, TLC
Remember Mayim Bialik, star of ’90s teen sitcom “Blossom”? She’s back, and she looks like shit! Bialik will be getting a makeover from style mavens Stacy London and Clinton Kelly on the season premiere of their popular TLC show. After “Blossom,” Bialik retired from acting to study neuroscience, although she’s made periodic returns to the screen (she played a lesbian on “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” a sexed-up version of herself on “Fat Actress,” and most memorably for me, was the star of the segment “Mayim Bialik American History” on ’90s MTV game show “Idiot Savants”). But it’s true that she generally looks terrible whenever she pops up. Perhaps London and Kelly can resuscitate her closet, if not her career. Just leave those Blossom hats alone!
“I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here!”
Monday 8pm, NBC
Back in 2003, ABC Americanized the hit British reality show “I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here!,” which is essentially “Survivor” with famous people. (Er, “famous” people—Jennifer Lopez’s second ex-husband won the first season.) The show flopped. So NBC, in its infinite wisdom, has decided to bring it back and put it on four nights a week for the majority of June. Cast members this time include Stephen Baldwin, “American Idol” joke Sanjaya Malakar, former model/professional crazypants Janice Dickinson (who came in second in the UK version), and “The Hills” atrocities Spencer and Heidi. Three more cast members have yet to be revealed, and are rumored to include Geraldo Rivera, Lou Diamond Phillips, and the wife of disgraced Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich, who was originally supposed to participate, but who got nixed by a judge. Boo. That I’d watch.
“Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien”
Monday 11:30pm, NBC
“The Tonight Show” will be watchable again for the first time since Johnny Carson retired in 1992. Unfunny hack Jay Leno has finally been shuffled off the stage along with his Dancing Itos, and offbeat ginger beanpole Conan O’Brien will finally take over tonight, bringing most of the gang from his “Late Show” program with him. The Max Weinberg 7 will remain house band, and former sidekick Andy Richter will return as announcer, having learned his lesson that it’s better to play Ed McMahon to a successful funnyman rather than toil away in increasingly awful short-lived sitcoms. First guests include Will Ferrell and Pearl Jam.