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Penney ante: The General Assembly session gets weird

First off, here’s a newsflash for you: Neither Jim Gilmore nor Jim Webb is going to be president of the United States. With Gilmore finally dropping his embarrassing (and largely invisible) quest for the Republican nomination, and Webb recently announcing that he will not mount an independent presidential bid, our dreams of an all-Virginian Jim/Jim unity ticket have been tragically shattered.

And for now, that’s all we have to say about the presidential race. Even as the stakes get ever higher (with the unexpected death of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia throwing fuel on an already-raging fire), we are going to take a brief respite before Virginia’s March 1 primary to turn our gaze toward Richmond.

Because, believe us, the drama that’s been playing out in our bucolic capital rivals anything that’s been happening on the campaign trail.

Of course, as with any General Assembly session, there’s the normal parade of legislative horribles, such as SB41, which would allow the commonwealth’s sanctioned marriage officiants to refuse their duty by invoking a “sincerely held religious belief” (passed by the Senate on a party-line vote), or HB781, which proposes to fine transgender youth $50 for using a bathroom that doesn’t match their “biological sex” (thankfully tabled by the House General Laws Committee), as well as the normal amount of head-scratchers (a bill banning the use of bullhooks on elephants was defeated, while a proposed fine for motorists who open a car door without first checking for traffic was opposed by 16 apparently bicyclist-hating senators), but the real fireworks came during an ongoing fight over State Supreme Court Justice Jane Roush.

Twice named to the court by Governor Terry McAuliffe using his interim appointment powers, Roush has been adamantly opposed by assembly Republicans for reasons that have never been particularly clear, except that they really don’t like McAuliffe. Still, despite the GOP majority’s best efforts to replace Roush with its chosen candidate, the Republicans have not been able to muster the necessary votes over many months of trying.

Until last week, that is, when—for a brief, shining moment—Republican leadership managed to get Democratic Senator L. Louise Lucas of Portsmouth to vote its way in committee, seemingly sealing Roush’s fate. But wait! After a hastily arranged meeting with Governor McAuliffe, Lucas abruptly returned to the Democratic fold, leaving Republicans fuming.

Even better, Lucas then went on to give an immensely entertaining interview to the Washington Post in which she excoriated the leadership of both parties, unloaded on Democratic Minority Leader Dick Saslaw for failing to support her in battles with Republican Majority Leader Tommy Norment and vividly recalled an argument with Norment where she told him to “keep your little, narrow white ass, little J.C. Penney-little-boys’-department-wearing-suits out of my [expletive] face.” (Norment is both quite diminutive and a bit of a dandy.)

The GA being the GA, the entire incident was soon turned into a smug and annoying inside joke, with Franklin’s Republican Senator Bill Stanley delivering a nudge-nudge-wink-wink floor speech honoring “one of the great American merchants of the 20th century,” while waving a J.C. Penney coupon around.

But still, with her unprecedented airing of the assembly’s dirty laundry and lacerating condemnation of the institution’s casually corrupt and dismissive good ol’ boys’ network, Senator Lucas has done us all a service. And that, friends, is no laughing matter.

Odd Dominion is an unabashedly liberal, twice-monthly op-ed column covering Virginia politics.

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Beginning of the end: Let the voting begin!

We’re going to kick off this week’s column with an unusual bit of product placement. Although we rarely endorse anything outside of C-SPAN call-in shows, we would like to take this moment to declare the Broadway musical Hamilton the best piece of politically inspired stagecraft since Frost/Nixon, and the best musical about the Founding Fathers ever (sorry, 1776). Seriously, if you need a soundtrack for the current presidential election season (which kicked into high gear this week with the first-in-the-nation Iowa caucuses), beg, borrow or steal a copy of the Broadway cast recording, and set aside two hours to listen to it from beginning to end. If you reach the point where Thomas Jefferson saunters in and belts out the Rush-meets-Elvis number “What’d I Miss?” (he’s been in France, see) and still aren’t hooked, then I’m not sure we can still be friends.

Anyway, as we enter this year’s completely unpredictable primary season, Hamilton provides a great reminder that American politics has always been filled with strivers and miscreants, and that our current crop of candidates—as cartoonish as some of them may be—pales in comparison to the epic characters who helped found this great nation.

Which brings us, perforce, to the current GOP frontrunners, Donald Trump, Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio. Now that Cruz has won the Iowa caucus vote, we can safely say the Republican Party establishment is screaming into its panic pillow. On the Democratic side, wild-maned Vermont socialist Bernie Sanders nearly pulled off an upset win against Hillary Clinton. But as we’ve said all along, the chances that Bernie will manage to engineer a repeat of Barack Obama’s winning 2008 primary campaign are infinitesimally small, and we fully expect him to be out of the race by May at the very latest.

Now all eyes turn to the New Hampshire primary, where Trump is favored to win (God help us all). The real battle on the Republican side will be for second place, which, at this writing, polls show as a four-way tie between Cruz, Rubio, Ohio Governor John Kasich and professional punch line Jeb Bush. With Rubio’s strong third-place finish in Iowa, he will probably nab second in New Hampshire (and perhaps even vault into the lead for the elephant’s South Carolina primary on February 20)—clearly the anti-Trump candidate. For the donkeys, there’s a good chance that Bernie could win this one. But as for his long-term chances, please see above.

And then (finally!) comes March 1, when 12 states (including Virginia) and American Samoa go to the polls to try to impose some order on this chaotic process. If Trump carries two of the first three GOP contests, this will be the final firewall to stop his momentum. In Virginia, expect polling place fireworks as Trump supporters find themselves confronted with the Republican Party of Virginia’s “loyalty pledge,” which will require them to either declare themselves a Republican or go home without voting. As for the Democrats, we are completely certain that Clinton will carry the day by a sizable margin.

But we were also certain that Trump would have been laughed out of the race by now, so what do we know?

Odd Dominion is an unabashedly liberal, twice-monthly op-ed column covering Virginia politics.

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The year in rear view: Our annual political quiz, odder than ever

Last year began, per usual, with politicians swarming the capitol for the kickoff of the General Assembly legislative session. Match each of the following attending personalities with a sordid detail from their past:

1) Former Governor Bob McDonnell

2) Current Governor Terry McAuliffe

3) Delegate Joe Morrissey

4) Senate Minority Leader Dick Saslaw

5) Senate Majority Leader Tommy Norment

a) Pleaded guilty to one count of contributing to the delinquency of a minor.

b) Lost more than $600,000 in campaign cash to an unscrupulous former treasurer.

c) Found guilty on multiple federal corruption charges, including failure to report a variety of gifts.

d) Unsuccessfully blackmailed by a former legal client over an extramarital affair he had with a lobbyist.

e) Once left his wife and newborn baby in the back of a limo while he attended a fundraiser.

6) During its winter session, the state Senate voted to ban which of the following?

a) All gifts from lobbyists with business before the Assembly.

b) The use of taxpayer money for conferences or meetings with agendas hidden from public view.

c) Semi-automatic assault weapons.

d) Pet monkeys.

7) In March, the Republican Party of Virginia (RPV) had to cancel a high- profile fundraiser when the featured speaker, South Carolina Representative Trey Gowdy, objected to the event’s name. What was it?

a) Playing the Trump Card

b) Reinforcing the Glass Ceiling

c) Beyond Benghazi

d) Operation Wetback

8) The current annual base pay for a member of Virginia’s House of Delegates is officially $17,640. According to a November 2014 accounting by the Daily Press (which factored in all reimbursements and perks but not election fundraising) what is the actual annual salary range?

a) $20,515 to $28,905

b) $32,453 to $41,787

c) $44,520 to $66,421

d) $72,110 to $125,550

9) In December, Attorney General Mark Herring caused a firestorm when he ruled the commonwealth would no longer recognize concealed-handgun permits from 25 states. How many existing Virginia laws did he nullify with this action?

a) 10

b) 7

c) 2

d) 0

10) The RPV recently proposed that voters in its open presidential primary sign a pledge that reads, “My signature below indicates that I am a Republican.” Which of the following reactions to this idea came from a Democrat?

a) “You’re gonna tell somebody who’s coming into the process that you can’t have a ballot? You’re gonna send them home? Are you insane?”

b) “That’s a real problem for a party that wants to be inclusive instead of exclusive. … We want to have as many people participate as possible, right?”

c) “The pledge—frankly—to me, it inhibits building a broader base for the party.”

d) “R.P. Virginia has lost statewide seven times in a row. Will now not allow desperately needed new voters. Suicidal mistake.”

e) None of the above

Odd Dominion is an unabashedly liberal, twice-monthly op-ed column covering Virginia politics.

Answers: 1-c, 2-e, 3-a, 4-d, 5-b, 6-d, 7-c, 8-c, 9-d, 10-e (source of quotes, in order: conservative radio host John Fredericks, Donald Trump’s campaign manager Corey Lewandow-ski, Prince William Delegate Bob Marshall, presidential candidate Donald Trump)

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Gun crazy: The columns that we hate to write

There’s no doubt that we have hobby horses we love to ride. Redistricting is a huge one, along with voter suppression, income inequality and the improbable perfection of Mark Warner’s teeth. But, believe it or not, we do not relish yet another opportunity to write about gun violence. Especially in a week when our patron saint Virgil Goode endorsed walking punchline Donald Trump for president, the last thing we wanted was to spend yet another column decrying America’s gun problem.

But here we are. In a year where there has been more than one mass shooting a day (defined as four or more people shot in one incident), we thought perhaps there was no level of violence that could truly shock us. But then, beginning on so-called Black Friday (the biggest shopping day of the year, and a day on which applications for new gun permits broke all previous records), two heinous acts of mass murder happened in such quick succession that they simply could not be ignored.

The first took place at a Planned Parenthood clinic in Colorado Springs, Colorado, where a deranged domestic terrorist named Robert Dear killed three people and wounded nine with a semiautomatic rifle before surrendering to police. The second occurred five days later, when husband and wife Syed Farook and Tashfeen Malik lay siege to a holiday party being thrown by Syed’s employer, the San Bernardino County Health Department, and were subsequently shot and killed by police.

The political response to the first attack was typical, with a chorus of politicians offering their “thoughts and prayers” for the victims and their families, but the legislative prospects for even minor gun control measures nonexistent.

The reaction to the second massacre was more vocal and varied, but only after it was revealed that the shooters were Muslim-Americans. (Syed was born and raised in Riverside, California, while Tashfeen was a Pakistani naturalized through marriage.) Then the floodgates opened, and formerly silent NRA-backed politicos rushed to label this an ISIS-style terrorist attack. Former Republican candidate for lieutenant governor E.W. Jackson, for instance, quickly tweeted: “San Bernardino shooting sounds like planned, coordinated attack. Shooters are missing. Could it be Paris-like Islamic terrorist attack?”

This twisted logic—where homegrown mass shootings are greeted with platitudes and inaction, while any attack with even a whiff of Islam about it is immediately considered an act of war (and thus an excuse to manufacture even more guns)—is just one more symptom of our country’s ongoing sick obsession with deadly firepower.

But while some Virginia politicians, like Senator Tim Kaine, were refreshingly blunt (“It’s past time for Congress to quit hiding and address what is a real sickness in this country,” he said during an interview on WTOP radio, “…but you’ve got a political class, frankly, that will not listen to the voters, because they’ve been buffaloed by gun manufacturers and the NRA.”), the consensus opinion in Congress is much closer to that of Richmond’s U.S. Representative Dave Brat, who told Politico, “At some point you have to decide as a nation what your first principles are. And the Second Amendment has been fundamental for a long time.” He then went on to perfectly demonstrate just how little compassion he—and, by extension, the entire Republican Party—has for the daily victims of gun violence in America by insisting that acting “on the basis of the Oprah Winfrey-ification of culture, of short-term feelings, that would be a very flawed model.”

On the word “feelings,” the Politico reporter noted, Brat mimicked the playing of a violin.

Odd Dominion is an unabashedly liberal, twice-monthly op-ed column covering Virginia politics.

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Unsettled: Syrian refugees and the politics of fear

You know, it takes a special kind of politician to unite elected officials from all points of the political spectrum. When was the last time you can remember a lone figure whose bold actions drew the same response from his own party and his opponents, from liberals and conservatives, and, indeed, from all right-thinking Americans?

Well, such a man is Roanoke Mayor David Bowers, a Democrat who achieved political infamy last week when he released a statement detailing his view that “it is presently imprudent to assist in the relocation of Syrian refugees to our part of Virginia,” and went on to favorably invoke President Roosevelt’s decision to “sequester Japanese foreign nationals after the bombing of Pearl Harbor.”

The reaction to this idiotic missive was swift and merciless, with Bowers’ fellow council members piling on as if it were a WWE free-for-all. They rushed to condemn the statement, calling it “juvenile,” “selfish” and “narcissistic,” while his own Vice Mayor David Trinkle offered a little armchair psychology, noting that Bowers was retiring from the mayorship, and that this was an attention-seeking “way to have another dance.” Bowers even got the two state parties to finally agree on something, with both state Democratic Party Chairwoman Susan Swecker and Republican Party of Virginia Chairman John Whitbeck publicly blasting the statement.

But the best response, bar none, came from Captain Hikaru Sulu himself, George Takei, who took to Facebook to excoriate Bowers, and to explain that the tens of thousands of Japanese-Americans who were interned during World War II (including himself) were “decent, honest, hard-working folks,” whose “lives were ruined, over nothing.”

What is truly sad is that Bowers wasn’t expressing an unpopular opinion, he just did it in such a ham-fisted way that even die-hard xenophobes were appalled. [Bowers apologized November 20.] But across the commonwealth, many politicians were voicing the exact same sentiment, just employing less incendiary language. Salem’s Republican Representative Morgan Griffith, for instance, said that it was “better to be safe than to be sorry,” and that “we should consider providing aid to help refugees elsewhere, without bringing them to American soil.”

Indeed, in the wake of the horrific terrorist attacks in Paris and Beirut, the idea of denying asylum to refugees from the Syrian war is widespread, and the issue has only increased the anti-immigration fervor being stoked by presidential aspirant (and Hair Club for Men poster boy) Donald Trump and his clown car full of Republican Party also-rans.

This sort of knee-jerk anti-refugee reaction is both heartless and absurd, as the very last way that a terrorist would try to make his way into the United States is through the State Department’s laborious, time-consuming refugee resettlement program. It is also, in our humble opinion, completely antithetical to Virginia’s long history of welcoming persecuted and displaced peoples from all over the globe. From the French Huguenots fleeing persecution in the 1700s to recent waves of refugees from Vietnam, Iran and South America, Virginia has provided safe haven, hospitality and opportunity to countless families fleeing the horrors of war.

We should not stop now, no matter what some callous, dimwitted, pandering politicians may think.

Odd Dominion is an unabashedly liberal, twice-monthly op-ed column covering Virginia politics.

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Keys to the kingdom: As election day looms, we have issues

Hard to believe, but yet another election is upon us, bringing with it the annual deluge of attack ads, yard signs, candidate forums and billowing clouds of special interest money. Per usual, a vast majority of the General Assembly races that will be decided next Tuesday are a foregone conclusion. Thanks to gerrymandering and a bipartisan compulsion to protect incumbents at any cost, we will almost certainly exit this election with the overall composition of the General Assembly barely changed.

The Democrats do have hopes, however, of gaining at least one seat in the state Senate, and thereby retaking control of the chamber (although the breakdown would be 20/20, Lieutenant Governor Ralph Northam would cast his tie-breaking vote for team blue). To find that seat, the Dems are focused on flipping the 10th District seat of retiring Senator John Watkins. They are also working hard to oust Republican senators Frank Wagner and Dick Black in the 7th and 13th districts, respectively, but neither one of those is an easy lift. The elephants, on the other hand, think they have a good shot at replacing retiring Democrat Chuck Colgan with Manassas Mayor Hal Parrish in the 29th District, or perhaps eking out a win over Senator John Edwards in the three-way race for the 21st District.

The question for all of these races is what, exactly, will motivate the electorate this time around? It’s always hard to pinpoint which issues will drive turnout and which ones will either fail to compel or, worse yet, backfire and motivate the other side to come out and vote in droves. With that in mind, here are the issues that seem to be getting the most play leading up to election day.

Gun control

This has long been considered a losing issue for Democrats, but in the wake of the horrific on-air shooting of news reporter Alison Parker and cameraman Adam Ward, some are betting that the issue of stricter gun laws will end up being a net positive. Candidates like Charlottesville’s Delegate David Toscano and Richmond Democrat Dan Gecker are speaking out forcefully in favor of tougher gun laws, and the issue is being given a high-profile push by ex-New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg, whose gun-control group Everytown for Gun Safety is spending millions running an ad featuring Parker’s father, Andy, urging reform. We’ll soon see if Virginia voters are finally ready to back modest gun control measures, or if they are still largely in thrall to the NRA.

Tolls, tolls, tolls

It was a foregone conclusion that Republicans would oppose a Virginia Department of Transportation plan to create “dynamically priced toll lanes” on the soul-crushing wasteland that is I-66 during rush hour. But they have really gone above and beyond, blanketing the airwaves with ads that accuse Governor Terry McAuliffe of proposing an outrageous $17 toll (obviously, and falsely, implying that this amount would be demanded of all drivers at all times). It’s a cheap, if clever, trick, and our gut tells us that it will work as intended, since most voters love to drive, and rarely pay attention to fact checkers or fine print.

Wacky tobacky

Finally, there’s the pro-weed group NORML, which is out pushing its THC-friendly agenda across the commonwealth and actively raising money for Democrat Ned Gallaway in his race against total buzzkill Senator Bryce Reeves in the 17th District. If they manage to pull that one off, it will be high times indeed.

Odd Dominion is an unabashedly liberal, twice-monthly op-ed column covering Virginia politics.

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Frenemies: No matter who wins, we lose

So here are a few things you should know about Virginia’s Senate Majority Leader Tommy Norment and Senate Minority Leader Dick Saslaw. They have a combined senate tenure of nearly 60 years, and have spent much of the recent past switching leadership positions as the Republicans gained, then briefly lost, then gained the majority again. They are both prodigious fundraisers and campaigners, and have become such permanent fixtures in the senate that one can easily imagine the capital cleaning crew arriving at night, hoisting each leader carefully from his chair and then stowing them in a well-appointed closet until the session resumes the next day.

They are also self-described “good friends,” and maintain a highly cordial relationship even whilst fighting to gain control of the closely divided senate chamber for their respective parties. In fact, back when disgraced former Governor Bob McDonnell was still considered a choirboy, it was well known that Norment and Saslaw would dine out together, often with a powerful lobbyist picking up the tab.

Of course, such ostentatious displays of ethically dubious behavior is largely a thing of the past, thanks to the fallout from McDonnell’s multiple corruption convictions. But even if they can’t enjoy quite as many lobbyist dinners as they once did, there’s little doubt that the two senate leaders are still a couple of (very white, very old) peas in an exceedingly comfortable pod.

And this shared bonhomie was on full display at a recent debate at Christopher Newport University. The purpose of the debate was ostensibly for the two party leaders to lay out their competing visions for the future, and to explain why their respective parties should have control of the senate in 2016.

But from the very first moments it was obvious that the two men would be, at best, only occasional combatants. Questioned about his then-undisclosed romantic relationship with a lobbyist whose firm was pushing legislation before the senate, Norment responded with a typical display of high dudgeon:  “I find that opening question to be a supercilious, impertinent question. You know very well I don’t discuss my personal life.”

This being a debate and all, you might have expected Saslaw to press the attack, and point out that this is the exact sort of ethical compromise that landed Bob and Maureen McDonnell in federal court. But instead Saslaw echoed Norment’s self-serving indignation, and then attempted to elicit sympathy as he discussed recent revelations that his former campaign treasurer had embezzled more than $650,000 from his campaign.

Unremarked upon by either man was how, exactly, a state senator can amass a reelection war chest so large that more than half a million bucks can be siphoned off without anyone noticing for almost a year. The answer, of course, is huge donations from companies with business before the senate (companies like TitleMax, a predatory “car-title lender” that has given around $37,000 to Saslaw, a staunch defender of the industry).

Toward the end of the debate, the two old bulls got into a tussle about who was more business-friendly, with Norment touting his caucus’ high scores from the Virginia Chamber of Commerce, and Saslaw huffing “go ask Dominion, go ask any of these companies—beer and wine wholesalers, banks, the development community—every one of them will tell you… I’m the most pro-business senator.”

And in the world of Virginia’s most powerful state politicians, that is obviously the only thing that matters.

Odd Dominion is an unabashedly liberal, twice-monthly op-ed column covering Virginia politics.