Categories
Living

Kangaroo court

I was sitting in the new John Paul Jones Arena looking at the flames of propane shoot up with every induction, and the incredible state-of-the-art digital billboards, watching little Cavalier fans wearing Christmas-morning gazes, when I realized that as fans they will never know anything other than those plush surroundings. No humid, un-air-conditioned, cramped University Hall for them!!!!

Ahh!!!! To be a young sports fan!!!!

(Note: If you think this column is going down the road of “When I was your age, we didn’t have TV. We listened to the radio. I walked to school in 3′ of snow, up hill, both ways…,” you’re right, it is.

Playstation 3, cushioned seating at sporting events, fireworks in arenas???

My youth featured Atari, seats so hard at the Philadelphia Spectrum you forget you had a butt by the third quarter, and nothing more awesome than a spotlight!!!   

The young generation of sports fans has it good today. And technology is becoming as big as the game to the sports fan.

A flat screen TV used to make you the talk of the town. Now just to fit in with the neighborhood, you need HDTV with plasma. Nobody’s TV sits on a stand anymore. I had people over the other week and they kept staring at my wall as if suddenly a screen would appear. One of my boys was sickened that I didn’t own something called 1080PHDTV? The only numbers I know are these: Channel 18 has the AFC and Channel 19 has the NFC.

Needless to say, the boys won’t be back at Casa de McElroy anytime soon.
   
Fortunately with my many of my Sundays spent at Fed Ex Field, I have gotten the opportunity to test a new invention by NFL Sunday Ticket called “Kangaroo TV.”

Just a little larger then the standard hand-held Blackberry, Kangaroo TV allows you to watch the full TV broadcasts of all NFL games, while simultaneously getting fantasy stats. Plus, there’s a red zone option that will automatically take you to every game where a touchdown is in reach.

Only available in Fed Ex and at Dolphins home games for a rental fee of $39.95 a game (yes, people are shelling out over $95 a pop to go see their team and than an additional $40 so they can keep tabs on every other game), KTV hasn’t gone retail yet.

When it does, can you imagine the impact it will have on society?

The wife wants quality time? Take her shopping and then just jump in with the hordes of other men gathered on benches at the mall huddled around their hands. The mall fountain will resemble a sports bar minus the smell of Budweiser and Marlboros.

Sunday youth soccer games won’t just bear the demographic of Good Housekeeping. You can be there playing “Father of the Year” at the same time you are making sure Chicago covers the spread.

The truth about technology is that we can’t fear it.  We need to accept, embrace it, cherish it and (if the people from Kangaroo are reading) we need to be hooking me up.

Wes McElroy hosts “The Final Round” on ESPN 840.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *