The earth plus plastic

The planet just is. And so are we. For a little while. Charlottesville remembers George Carlin.

So I woke up yesterday, looked at the news and then wandered out to have a cup of coffee and see what a world without George Carlin might look like.

I spent my first 18 years of life being vaguely aware that Rufus of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure also did stand-up. Then, on the first day of my News Writing class in college, my professor Richard Roth showed Carlin’s bit on the language of flying from Jamming In New York. ("Fuck you, I’m getting in the plane.")

That was it. I got my first couple VHS recordings that Christmas, bought the rest of his stuff on CD and spent that year walking around with a Discman listening to Carlin sing "Muhammad Ali, Muhammad Ali."

I fairly tortured my freshman-year roommate with daily viewings of "Back In Town."  Subsequent roommates didn’t get off much easier. (Sorry about that, folks.) I spent a summer in Philly memorizing "You Are All Diseased," which proved fairly prophetic two years later in September of 2001.

Looking around the local web, it looks like some other folks had similar reactions to mine.

Cripsy Duck had the obvious and appropriate headline.

The United State of Jamerica actually had two posts, the second one highlighting yet another example of Carlin’s continued relevance. (And if you’re not reading USOJ daily, why the hell not?)

Jen Sorensen, whose cartoon Slowpoke runs in C-VILLE, linked to Carlin’s living catalog of dirty words.

Jen on the Edge links to the routine that made its way out of the clubs and all the way to the Supreme Court—Outskirts Guy posts the video.

Most of the people referenced Carlin’s "Seven Words You Can Never Use on Television" routine, and that’s certainly his most famous one. But the one that always stuck with me the most, especially as I sat through meetings around here with environmentalists patting themselves on the back for creating such a green community (and that’s no small accomplishment, don’t get me wrong), was this one.

In summation: The planet is fine. The people are fucked.

"Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. Nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine. The PEOPLE are fucked. Difference. Difference. The planet is fine. Compared to the people, the planet is doing great. Been here four and a half billion years. Did you ever think about the arithmetic? The planet has been here four and a half billion years. We’ve been here, what, a hundred thousand? Maybe two hundred thousand? And we’ve only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. Two hundred years versus four and a half billion. And we have the CONCEIT to think that somehow we’re a threat? That somehow we’re gonna put in jeopardy this beautiful little blue-green ball that’s just a-floatin’ around the sun?

The planet has been through a lot worse than us. Been through all kinds of things worse than us. Been through earthquakes, volcanoes, plate tectonics, continental drift, solar flares, sun spots, magnetic storms, the magnetic reversal of the poles…hundreds of thousands of years of bombardment by comets and asteroids and meteors, worlwide floods, tidal waves, worldwide fires, erosion, cosmic rays, recurring ice ages…And we think some plastic bags, and some aluminum cans are going to make a difference? The planet…the planet…the planet isn’t going anywhere. WE ARE!"

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